Wow! this blog stuff brings surprising results. Yes Anne Marie, this is the same Scot Miller that used to go clubbing in Detroit.I never quite made it to Stanford. I have, however, had some interesting life experiences since we last talked. Send me an E-mail if you can bear the thought of me!

As for the rest of you who might think that a repentant person of marginal integrity might have money to repay my drug debts, you are sorely mistaken.

However, I can pray for you!

I have just finished with meeting for worship and I was led to share some thoughts about the idea of an abusive deity. Of course, I don't feel that God is an abusive provider, but it is often mentioned at ESR, and there have been books written on the subject. I suppose some examples of God as an abuser are not only the book of Hosea, but the whole matter of the Holocaust. It seems to me, however, that if you are going to believe in a Creator God who participates in and responds to the ongoing struggles of day-to-day life, you might assume it healthy to mend the relationship. Hey, if God is prone to suffering and loss, then God is prone top the whole range of emotions, including some that might need to be forgiven. If a believer is in the state of mind that God has been more abusive to them than say, the Haitians or Vietnamese, maybe they could try practicing some forgiveness. Indeed, YHWH seems like a forgiving chap, might we practice the same type of loving response to the deity who brought us through all of the tough times in good enough shape to practice such sound theology.

Just checking in

It's been a while since I've checked in, with it being the final week of the semester and such. My mind has been busy with a paper on the non-violent atonement, and with Biblical Greek, though not so much with Biblical Greek! Thinking of non-violence, however, has led me to consider the last four years of my life, spent working with many folks who do not place much stock in non-violence as an appropriate response to very much of anything.
I have spent much time in the recent years with the homeless community of Grand Rapid, and the last year with some pretty broken teens. Of course, my ideal is that I will always introduce non-violence as a way of life to the communities I work with, hoping that they might "see the light" and refute violence, and embrace conflict resolution techniques that will solve every problem and lead to world peace.
What I have learned is that it is primarily my self that needs to recommit to certain principles, but understand that non-violence is not achieved easily, nor is reconciliation, nor is justice. I am often confronted with crisis, sometime physical danger, and while I have never taken a swing at anyone, I have had to break up fights, wrestle people to the ground, and otherwise act in ways that seemingly (not seemingly, they in fact do) conflict with principles of non-violence.
My point is not that non-violence is unachievable, but that it is hard work. When we work with at-risk or oppressed communities, or even our loving neighbors, we are often confronted with the reality of violence that permeates our society.
After calling myself a pacifist for a few years, God actually put me to the test. I have come to realize that while I make many claims about non-violence, I am indeed a sinner, and I thank God for the grace I receive when I fail to love my neighbor, and when I fail to reflect God's loving will for all of creation.
The work of Jesus was tough work, and he calls us to do the same. My prayer for the night is that I might learn from my failings, to help others respond to crisis more lovingly than I often do, and that I may someday be able to contain my impulses that often guide my response to troubled and broken people and situations.

community, or not

Everyone is clamoring to be part of a community, the problem being that no one wants to give up their individual desires in order to do it. Those who have had to listen to me over the past year and a half are probably sick of hearing me say it, but contemporary ideas of community are nothing more that one finding a nice club of like minded people to underwrite personal desires. Community in the postmodern sense is a collection of individuals seeking the support of friendly folks who will ooh and ahh over their dreams (which is nice, I like when people ooh and ahh over my dreams) but fail to contribute in any way to the edification of the community's growth.
Let's just say that, for instance, that there is a terribly unhealthy relationship in the midst of community, or simply one person engaging in unhealthy decision making. It is not very often that people are willing to accept personal direction for the betterment of community, at the expense of personal desires being met. Most of us would rather feel good about maintaining unhealthy relationships that meet specific needs, that might be best left unmet, instead of sacrificing for the benefit of those surrounding us.
An interesting thing is that most of our desires, most of our dreams, are dreams of self-fulfillment and aggrandizement, and not dreams that will further build our community in a manner that brings ourselves and others closer to being a community of God.
Really, it is a matter of self-definition. Am I willing to identify more closely with the needs of my neighbor than my own personal desires. That is a tough thing for an all-American boy or gal to do. It has proven difficult for me to grasp for my own behavior, yet easy to point out in others. Most of our dreams (my dreams) are based upon the idea that we have met our full potential, if not economically, than spiritually. It is amusing to me that the means that we employ to be successful financially seem to be closely related to the means we employ to move forward spiritually. We measure ourselves by personal fulfillment, (how many people have I helped today), instead of how we have served the living God by reflecting the sacrifice of Jesus, who invited people to be part of his community. Instead of serving individuals through a system of social services (which are important) we should build communities that invite and welcome the marginalized as possible contributors. Building communities that offer alternatives to those desire based clubs is one step the church needs to take in order to build faithfulness to a God that is not propped up as a mere proponent of the American experiment.

Oh, he's just a guy saying that

I find it interesting that in the pursuit of equality between sexes, which should never have had to been pursued in the first place (the church has been a little behind), women continue to get the crappy end of the stick. In a movement that suggests women have been viewed solely as objects of sexual desire/fulfilment for males, or objects of sexual desire that also birth male heirs and house help, I fail to see how equality has been reached for females in the past four decades, other than the ability to perform as wage slaves, or successfully exploit wage slaves while earning lesser wages than their male counterparts for the same work. The main thrust of what I see as the biggest injustice, is that women are still viewed primarily as fodder for the ever prowling male libido, or ego. (is the really a difference?)

What seems to have happened is that while women have continued to be mostly rejected as equals in a continuing male dominated world, Western, and especially American women, tend to view themselves as being liberated primarily through a variety of expressions concerning sexual freedom. While I can definitly relate to an all out battle for a womans demand for orgasmic opportunity to be fully met, I have a hard time understanding how the ability to freely participate in a culture dominated by unhealthy, (i.e. exploitative) and still male dominated, views of sexuality and womens health concerns, equalls true freedom. Sexual fulfilment within the confines of covenant relationships are healthy. Male and female counterparts parading their availability in a context of free market intimacy is simply giving in to the ever present male need for constant stimulation, leaving women as nothing more than the sex objects they have always been to the male point of view, only now they are also responsible for supporting the family as well as doing the chores.

What might really address the problem is an all out assault on male dominance and privilege, instead of acquiesence tothe female quest for sexual opportunity that allows everyone to let their hair down, but not their guard. And for all you women in committed relationships, demand those orgasms!

Rambling on about diversity

I am in the midst of an interesting conversation at work, and the question being discussed includes issues of privilege, as well as the responsibility of those who are suddenly "credentialed" to make a living in the United States. Also, there is the question of the purposes served by "diversity" projects that are common at most colleges in the US.

At the root of the question is the moral issues involved by fighting an oppressive entity, not necessarily in order to overturn the injustice that is inherent to the entity, but in order to more fully participate in it. For example, lets take the issue of gays in the military. From the Quaker perspective, homosexuals are equal to heterosexuals in the eyes of the Creator, and certain civil rights should be granted to gays and lesbians, and protected, by the state. Yet, one of the issues involved in the battle for equal rights under the law is the right to join the military.

In what way is justice served when the victim of oppression is granted the freedom to protect an oppressive system through the use of violence? On the same token, how is justice served when economically disadvantaged persons suddenly increase their earning potential. How just is it to grant someone who could not previously take advantage of economic exploitation new opportunities to further exploit. Questions like this should certainly be asked as we engage the wider culture about personal rights.

So, the question of credentialing and diversity comes up. How am I living according to the example of Jesus by participating in an academic system that primarily serves persons of privilege? How would inviting oppressed persons into academia serve to overturn that oppression?

I see possibilities for change, even through those dastardly religious institutions known as seminaries, but only if we pay more attention to hands on theology than we do to trinitarian or Eucharistic issues. And only if we listen closely to those diverse voices that we invite, perhaps hoping they might come 'round to agree with our own way of thinking, so that we can continue to facilitate change according to our own privileged terms.

Our family had a discussion about Christmas today at dinner. Of course, the kids are all for fully decorating the house, lots of presents, and anything else that we might fit into our small living room. Jenn likes Christmas, and would like to have decorations up as well. As for me, I can stand what Christmas has become; a commercial bonanza of glitz and debt that not only promotes the sin of materialism, it promotes the type of idolatry that Constantine hoped it would replace when Christmas was placed in competition with the foremost pagan holiday of the time. The fact that Jesus was probably born around late August or early September seems to be lost on everyone, perhaps because the very idea of Christmas has evolved to be a larger event the the humble beginnings of the Messiah.

Our daughter Emma suggests that the gift giving commemorates the story of the magi giving gifts after the birth of Jesus and his identification as a king. That is pretty clear thinking, but it seems to me that we might better celebrate the birth of Jesus by regarding his humble beginnings with a type of reverence that certainly seems missing from the debt circus that Christmas has become.

As for giving gifts, Emma is exactly right that we ought to give of ourselves, both spiritually and materially, in remembrance of Jesus, but this should certainly be done on a daily basis by both individuals and meetings as a standard liturgy of giving in the name of Christ. Once a year events magnify the boasting aspect of gift giving. Daily humility recognizes the importance of rightly sharing resources with those who need them the most.

If I hear one more commercial on the radio suggesting that a diamond proves that my wife is "the most important chapter of my life story," I'll puke. And then I'll try to express my love by dedicating every day to her emotional, spiritual, and physical needs, that we might write a life story together that doesn't need a diamond to sponsor it.

By the way, I fudged and said their could be decorations as long as they were home made, and that Emma could have Christmas lights in her room - though it might end up looking more like a Cass Corridor bar than a Quaker girl's bedroom. http://sem.earlham.edu/~millesc1/